


And He Is 'Zo

by lluviadinoche



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Fanfiction Writer AU, M/M, three shot
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-24
Updated: 2020-02-24
Packaged: 2021-02-28 02:07:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22886023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lluviadinoche/pseuds/lluviadinoche
Summary: "Do you think I only love you because you're famous?"Lorenzo nodded."Well, you're wrong. I love you because you are not Lorenzo Vargas to me. To me, you are Zo."----When Antonio goes to meet his internet friend at a convention, he doesn't expect him to be his favorite actor and he doesn't expect to find out that he was the first to realize why Lorenzo stayed out of the light. And he especially doesn't expect to find out that the world has a lot to say when they silence him.He has nothing to offer. No money. No glamor. All he can offer someone like Lorenzo is his love and the promise that he will help him find his voice.{three-shot} {dedicated to my girlfriend, Loca. Thank you for being wonderful}
Relationships: South Italy/Spain (Hetalia)
Kudos: 15





	And He Is 'Zo

**Author's Note:**

> This is dedicated to my girlfriend Loca (@living-lovino-loca on tumblr)
> 
> Thank you for being the moonlight in my life.

**[ElGuerroToni]:** I saw your latest comment on my fic and I thought that it was so nice! It really helped me since I’ve been feeling down about my work lately.

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** No problem. Though ur characterization of Matteo was really good n ur flow is gr8. Also u got his and Fernandos relationship down p well. U need 2 stop being such a lil bitch and accept ur a really good writer

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** Haha. Your comments are so articulate :0 It’s funny to see you use text talk

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** U say that every time lol. Bein fancy is 2 hard

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** Lmao. Whack ass.

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** Mayhaps. At least I don’t speak with a theta

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** >:(( u WEENIE

Antonio chuckled, staring at his phone like the helpless fool that he was. It had been over a year since he began talking to Zo and every day filled him with laughter. He knew it was easy to get catfished. God, he knew. That was how he met his ex Roderich who was _nothing_ like the pictures he had sent. So, he was a bit nervous now talking to Zo even though he trusted him greatly and didn’t doubt that he was a real person and looked as he describes himself. After all, everything else Zo said checked out. He sent lots of pictures of the things he was doing and the people with him.

And they both really loved Matteo, though Zo seemed to love him more than Antonio.

Matteo was not a person in real life though. He was a character from their favorite show, _The Southern Identity_ , a fantasy show where magic was seen as a hierarchical thing that only the well educated could master or even handle because it required being able to read ancient texts and create spells from them. Of course all the rich and educated were the powerful people up North. But Matteo, a mute boy from the South, decides to attempt to master magic in order to tear down the system the North uses to push the South down with excuses of “protection”.

Antonio loved it. He was obsessed with it and he absolutely adored Matteo’s character. But he also adored his love interest, Fernando. And that is what he wrote about.

His current fic was a historical AU, taking place during Italian Unification. He was rather nervous writing it since he didn’t know all that much about Italian history, but Zo was a huge help there.

_“So basically, Italy had a boner for Prussia bc they kicked Austria’s ass.”_

_“All you need to know is that Cavour and Garibaldi are my daddies and here’s a 20 page essay on why”_

_“And then the South went into even more poverty and that’s why we yote tf out to America just to get lynched and told we r all in the Mafia.”_

_“In conclusion, fuck da North”_

He had such a way with words. It was like Antonio was right there with him.

He had to admit, he had developed some feelings for him. Though he never saw his face, he assumed Zo has his reasons. After all, Zo was rather insecure about a lot of things and though Antonio did his best to promise him there was nothing to fear, he still preferred to wait until they met in person to show his face.

_“I’m already mute. idk if i wanna see u all disappointed when u see my face.”_

He couldn’t understand it, but he didn’t push it. Zo always sent videos of what he was doing and his friends were always so chill and willing to speak for him if they were there since it was easier than listening to his extra phone read out his words. 

Zo really connected to Matteo. He constantly talked about it and sometimes Antonio wished he could sit next to him under the stars and just listen to every last thing he had to say. It pushed him to start learning sign language and when he sent videos to Zo, he loved seeing the emoji spams from him from how happy it made him.

And even now, as his phone lit up with another notification from Zo, Antonio couldn’t help but swoon. God, he prayed this wasn’t some professional catfish. He didn’t know if his heart could bear it.

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** Maybe >:3c r u working on your cosplay for the convention?

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** ye! Fer’s armor is taking too long. Aaaaaah. But I want to look good because this is the first con that Lorenzo Vargas is going to be at and I really want to get his autograph and picture and talk to him.

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** Gaaaay. U have such a boner for him lmao. But im sure he’ll love ur cosplay. U worked hard on it. I won’t be in cosplay tho

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** :( bitch why

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** Can’t do it :/ but i’ll make sure to take a pic of my fit so u dont spent all ur time lost lol. Rmber 2 meet @ the Lorenzo Vargas Booth

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** mhm! Will do. I _still_ can’t believe that you managed to get me both a photo op and autograph. How did you even do that :0

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** I have my ways. I gtg 2 work but lmk how ur cosplay looks l8r

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** will do. Dont die at work, crusty.

And like that, he logged off and Antonio watched his little dot switch from green to grey.

He still had a hard time believing it. He’d been wanting to meet Zo forever and knowing he lived just a 30-minute drive away was killing him. He respected his privacy still and he was over the moon knowing that they’d finally see each other.

But he was also over the moon knowing he’d get to finally meet Lorenzo Vargas. He never did live interviews, he always sent his brother, and he was probably the most secretive celebrity anyone knew. He never answered reporters and he always was silent when he walked by. The show was also really good about representation for him and didn’t vocalize his thoughts.

“Are you done talking to that crush of yours?” Francis asked, walking out of his bedroom.

“For now yes. I wish he didn’t have to work so much. Even I’m not gone that long.” Antonio said, flopping over on the floor, barely missing the hot glue gun that he didn’t realize was on.

Francis made his way over, sitting down next to him and shook his head, “Are you excited?”

“Of course I am.” Antonio said, “I know how Zo feels about being in public without his brother or friends so I really am happy to finally get to meet him. Plus, he said that some of my ideas are so good that he thought Lorenzo Vargas might like them!”

“Mhm. Well, Lorenzo Vargas is a weird celebrity. Zo may mean well but we still don’t know much about Lorenzo Vargas, which is weird given how his popularity is growing.”

“That’s probably why he finally decided to make an appearance. I still can’t believe Zo managed to hook us up with a photo op and autograph. I really owe him a ton.”

Francis chuckled and shoved Antonio gently, “I didn’t take you for the sugar baby type.”

Antonio gasped, feigning offense. Putting his hand to his forehead, he shook his head and pouted, “Are you suggesting I’m a _bottom?”_

“Oh Antonio, I’m not suggesting anything. I know you are.”

“Rude. Just for that..” Antonio took some modge podge and slapped a bit on Francis’ face.

The shriek that erupted from him left Antonio near deaf.

But god was it amusing. So he didn’t really care about the neighbors below them hitting the ceiling with a broom in order to tell them to shut up.

“You judge me and yet that time Zo send a picture of his tattoos, you came drooling to me. Don’t cast stones at me simply because you cannot bear the weight of your own shortcomings.”

“Stop trying to sound deep all the time when I know your head is empty.”

Francis gasped, “So rude! Just for that, I’m not helping you with this cosplay or making you breakfast. Starve!”

“I knew you never loved me.” Antonio put his hand to his heart, “Why don’t you just tell me about your whores and let’s end this.”

He didn’t even get to open his eyes before Francis launched a towel at him and he burst out laughing.

* * *

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** All done! It’s really late though. What are you doing up? :0

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** Not sleepy so im watching road to el dorado

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** Oh I love that movie. I cosplayed Tulio a bit ago. Maybe you can be my Chel ;)

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** Idk if u noticed but I’m v hairy and covered in tats

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** Only the weak let that stop them

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** Haha

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** Fine. Ill think abt it but dont count on it. I’ll prolly do better as miguel

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** yay!

“Still talking to that fan?” Feliciano walked in.

Lorenzo looked up and nodded.

“You really should have told him who you are, Lore. He might freak out when you meet.”

Frowning, he shook his head.

“I understand why you’re worried. But given he has been flirting with you, I think it might be important to tell him who you are. He could react weirdly and not be the same when he finds out.” Feliciano explained, “He’s a cute guy and I know you care about him, but he is _still_ a fan and that could end badly for you.”

Frowning more, Lorenzo gnawed on his lip. He shook his head again. No. He couldn’t do it. He didn’t know how he’d begin to explain everything to Antonio. And above all, he didn’t want to think of him acting differently than he was when he found out who he was really.

 _‘I don’t know. We’re already lucky that the producers haven’t said anything. I don’t really want to disappoint, especially given he’s mentioned how he wonders what I sound like since I refuse to do live interviews and everything.’_ he signed.

“But Lore-”

A paper ball hit Feliciano.

_‘No. It will be fine and better like this. If he reacts weirdly at the convention, then that’s that.’_

Thinking about things going poorly was not a good feeling. Given the fondness he had grown for Antonio, he didn’t want him to turn out to be a crazed fan.

He was pretty secure in the knowledge that he wouldn’t. After all, he and Antonio were roughly the same age and Antonio seemed to be rather mature when he wasn’t messing around and being silly. Still, people were unpredictable.

“Okay. Whatever you chose. But don’t say I didn’t warn you, Lore.”

And as much as he loved his brother, he wanted to strangle him just the same. He knew Feliciano didn’t mean it, but it felt like he was being coddled and told that he was incapable of doing things himself.

_‘And he is not flirting. It’s just how we talk.’_

“Sure Lorenzo. Whatever. I’m going to go. Cristiano and Luciano are here if you need them though.”

Need them?

God, he knew it wasn’t the intention of any of them to treat him as inferior, but that’s what he got. Ever since he allowed Feliciano to take his place in interviews, it was the same thing and it made his blood boil. It was why he finally chose to be present at a convention for once because he was tired of it.

He was mute, not dead nor a child. He was fully capable of doing things on his own and he didn’t “need” anyone to do basic things in life. All he asked what for Feliciano to speak for him so he could build up the courage to reveal himself as he was when he wanted. But now it was this mess and all it did was make Lorenzo’s heart weep.

He couldn’t have a damn thing on the Earth, could he?

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** I have to go, but I’ll talk to you later.

 **[ElGuerroToni]** Awe ): okay.

Maybe in another world, he and Antonio could meet without things like fame or coddling or expectations affecting them. Yes, that sounded like a dream.

* * *

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** I wrote a poem because I thought of you. Want to hear?

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** I’m going to share anyway!

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** I have never known a beauty to shine more clear

Than the genuine compassion and love so dear

That you radiate in your actions and silly fights

A beauty from inside that burns so bright

Your bitter words and sarcastic taunts

Can never break my heart apart

So wake to the sun and the bluest skies

And my care for you that never dies

* * *

 _[NEW COMMENT FROM: IDreamOfCannoli]_ I love this so much. I think what I appreciate most about your writing is that your style follows a structure similar to how the show is told. You don’t expose any thoughts the characters have and it adds especially to the understanding of why Matteo is frustrated and how those around him react because we as the audience cannot hear his thoughts and are stuck simply with everyone else watching Matteo struggle to let us know what is going on.

* * *

“I sent him pictures. He said he was busy today so he hasn’t responded yet, but I hope he likes it. I worked so hard and am so glad that I’m done.” Antonio told Francis as he started packing his bags for the convention, “Ah! I can’t believe it’s only a few days until I meet Zo and my favorite actor. Can you believe it?”  
“I can’t. But I’m rooting for you. Get yourself a boyfriend.”

Antonio chuckled and shook his head, “No, I don’t think Zo likes me like that. I’ve been trying to throw hints for a few months now, but he hasn’t really...acknowledged them. He said he liked the poem I wrote a couple of weeks ago, but he didn’t state anything about its meaning. I think I’ll have to accept I am facing rejection.”

Francis frowned and sat down in front of him, “Well, feelings don’t register well over text. Maybe he hasn’t picked up on it yet.”

“I don’t know. I’ve been really obvious. I think he just doesn’t feel the same.” Antonio shrugged, “Which is okay. I’ll get over it. I really just can’t wait to finally see his face”

“I’ll bet. Make sure you’re safe though.”

“I know, I know,” Antonio shook his head, “Don’t worry. I specifically requested meeting there instead of somewhere private because I know that you can never be too cautious.”

“Good. You’re not completely stupid.” Francis teased, shoving Antonio playfully, “Well, I’m rooting for you. You deserve a good man and Zo seems nice. Most of the time. I still don’t like the fact he insults the French.” he huffed.

Antonio rolled his eyes, “I’ll make sure to tell him that you don’t appreciate it.”

Glancing at the calendar, his heart began to race. A few days. That was it. A few days and he would finally get to meet Zo and Lorenzo and his con crunch stress would be all worth it. Just a little bit longer.

* * *

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** u awake?

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** yeah, what’s up, zo?

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** If it weren’t for the fact I promised to see you, I’d drop the convention right now. I feel like shit is so wrong

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** Feli again?

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** yeah.

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** Coddling again?

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** yeah…

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** Go off for as long as you need

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** Im just tired! Im tired of the same shit with him and I know he isnt doing this on purpose to really hurt me but he can’t look past himself to see the way his bs damages me and hurts me! I tell him I want to do this on my own and that I dont need anyone to b there acting like idk how to do things on my own

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** Like. He constantly takes over my things. I’ve been trying to speak for myself for so long now and especially with the con, he’s trying to take that place too.

 **[ElGuerroToni]:**?

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** How is he planning to take your place at the con??? is he saying he’ll meet me instead of you?

Fuck. Slip up.

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** No, I meant like coming along and trying to speak for me instead of letting me speak. And knowing him, he’ll say things I’d never say.

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** Ah, I see. That’s really not fair to you, Zo. It’s rlly stupid to act like you can’t take care of yourself and constantly forcing you into a submissive place. 

**[IDreamOfCannoli]:** yeah….i just wish people stopped judging me for this. it makes it harder for me to feel like im welcome or ever gonna be allowed to just...live??? idk I’ll get over it

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** That’s not something you should get used to

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** What else can I do?

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** Keep fighting to exist as you are. You don’t owe anyone your submission

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** What if I’m tired of fighting and getting nowhere?

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** Then I’ll fight for you :) You mean a lot to me Zo and you deserve better than to have everyone walk over you and act like you don’t have words that deserve to be known. You have feelings and thoughts too and nobody should take that away from you.

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** u sound so corny lmao

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** I’ll speak a thousand corny words if it helps ease your mind even just a little

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** Thank you, Antonio

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** Anything for you, Zo. Sleep well. It’s late for you.

* * *

The first time that Zo wrote fanfiction, Antonio could feel his heart melt. How his characterization was so spot on and beautiful, he didn’t understand. He envied him. How did someone like that manage to create such beauty? How did he weave a tale that brought him tears? Zo hadn’t been writing for nearly as long as Antonio and yet he was so far ahead, unreachable, beautiful, and free. He didn’t stop reaching and it destroyed Antonio. It brought him to his knees and knocked his pride down.

He wanted nothing but to cherish every word that he wrote and let them soak into his skin. Each chapter dedicated to someone that he wished was him.

It hurt him to know that Zo was someone else’s. It burned him more than anything. Yet, he couldn’t do anything about that. He didn’t own him.

Was that what burned him up so much now as he got his things ready for the convention? Was he burning and dying knowing that meeting Zo, though a wonderful thing to be, wouldn’t ever be what he desired it to be?

His pride was finally suffocating him.

* * *

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** I’m @ the booth. C u there :)

This didn’t count as lying. He was telling Antonio the truth after all and was revealing who he was now. He supposed he did feel _some_ guilt for having not told him before, but it was a safety thing and he hadn’t expected to get so attached to him. It had just happened and now he was finally untangling the mess he had started.

He could see the people beginning to line up and he didn’t see Antonio yet. It made his heart clench. What if he was angry with him? Or what if he bailed? What if he wasn’t able to make it and-

 **[ElGuerroToni]:** Im on my way! See you in a bit! What are you wearing? You didn’t send me a picture of your outfit.

 **[IDreamOfCannoli]:** Look for the loser in a dark red turtleneck, black jeans, and demonias. 

**[ElGuerroToni]:** Haha ok!

So this was real now.

He kept his eyes open and kept looking around. Antonio wasn’t there first, but he didn’t mind. What he did mind, however, was the stares from people when he finally came through the curtains to sit down and his new interpreter, Gilbert, was right there behind him.

He could see the confused looks, the questions popping up, the whispers. God, it made him sick to think about the way the infantilization would continue even more after this.

He looked up at Gilbert, nodding as he sat down. Avoiding meeting people’s eyes right away, he began to sign.

“Hello. It is a pleasure to meet you all. I apologize for taking so long to make a convention appearance, you all look so wonderful.”

* * *

He ran as fast as he could. Antonio was already getting there late. Though he knew being late wouldn’t affect seeing Zo, he knew that it would affect seeing Lorenzo Vargas and as much as he was over the moon joyous to see Zo, he really wanted to see his favorite actor.

But he didn’t see him when he got there. Antonio thought for a moment that he had gone to the restroom or something. It had only been a few minutes since he got Zo’s text. He would have told him something.

“Antonio.” a voice called.

He whipped his head up, eyes falling on some starving Victorian boy looking man and he immediately furrowed his brows. That wasn’t Zo.

He looked to the side and oh god.

Dark red turtle neck. Black jeans.

Those tattoos poking from his neck and rolled up sleeves.

_“Holy shit.”_

“Come on over. I had an extra seat brought in for you.” Gilbert spoke.

This couldn’t be real. This was something that only happened in movies. Was he being played? Maybe it was a mistake or maybe Zo just told Lorenzo what he looked like-wait.

Zo.

Lorenzo.

Antonio’s eyes widened. Was he really _this_ much of a dumbass?

He did as requested, walking over, eyes still wide in disbelief. Even when he was finally sitting down next to Lorenzo, he couldn’t believe it. This had to be some elaborate joke because if not that meant he had sent thirst edits to the real Lorenzo Vargas and talked about how he’d let Lorenzo Vargas top him. That wasn’t exactly what he wanted to have confirmed.

“Z-Zo?”

Lorenzo nodded.

Antonio’s entire face went red. Oh god. Oh fuck. This was _not_ how he had envisioned this meeting.

Lorenzo seemed all too amused.

“That...explains a lot.” Antonio said.


End file.
